Poison to the System
by Butterfly-winged Rat
Summary: [Oneshot] [Yaoi] [BryanKai] The most dangerous drink to give a Russian isn't alcohol.


Poison to the System

The Butterfly-winged Rat

---

Among all the boys of Neo-Borg, it was an established fact that all of them could hold out really well with alcohol. Tala was known for his ability to stomach even the most bizarre of mixes. Spencer could chug down barrels at a time. Ian knew the difference to any type of liquor. And as for Bryan, he was almost famous for his amazing tolerance.

There was yet to be a drink created that could knock him out.

Or so they said.

Kai didn't like to believe in tales spread by those who just 'heard' about what they conveyed. To say that hearing the younger boys talk about 'who would win in a drinking competition' irritated him would have been an understatement.

What was worse was that when winter time rolled around, it became the team's favorite hobby and they spent hour after hour chugging down as much as they could get into their system.

It was the abbey's version of horse racing. Everyday, the results of who fell first would change depending who got the choice of what to serve.

On days where Ian was in charge, Tala would usually hit the table first, not being used to 100 pure alcohol. Spencer would last shortest when Tala served. Some said he even mixed hints of rat poisoning in there, but the only one who'd be able to tell for sure would've been Ian, and he refused to confirm whatever it was he detected in Tala's brews.

It was more of a cycle, their game. So to say that one person had a better winning streak then everyone else would get just about any of them upset.

That's what they hated about Bryan.

On the other hand, Kai had been getting so sick and tired about hearing their drinking stories. He decided he was going to find a way to shut them up once and for all.

"A challenge?" Tala asked, suspicious of Kai's intent. "What kind, Hiwatari?"

Bait and reel. "A drinking challenge. If you manage to survive one round of my choice, I pay you one grand." The others gaped. He had to be pretty confident for him to put up those kinds of stakes on something like this. The other demolition boys looked at each other, ready to agree. "HOWEVER," he stressed. "If you lose… you stop drinking every bloody day. It's getting on my nerves that you're all sloshed come morning."

Bryan sneered at the sidelines, acting as if he was an exception to the statement. It was kind of irritating, because Bryan had always been the one messing around with them during their hangover and had always been too cocky all about it. It didn't make Kai feel any better that just yesterday; Bryan drew on Tala's face with a permanent marker and blamed it on him.

Oh, it was on.

All of them nodded in agreement. There was no way they wanted to miss the opportunity to win more then any of them ever had in their lives.

Happy with the decision, Kai lead them in to the kitchen where he had a table set up, four large glasses atop them. The four gathered around, looking nervously at the things, but not saying anything about it.

Ian went first, taking the glass that was meant for him. He took a whiff of it and visibly paled. He couldn't discern what Kai had put in the drink and it scared him. He didn't even know it was possible to find something he had not yet tried. Nodding his head, he put the glass to his lips and took it all at once, falling backwards in the process.

The others looked down at him, positively stupefied. He was out cold. Ho, shit. They were all dead.

"I'll go next." Spencer offered. Kai handed him the glass, which surprisingly, was only filled half-way. Spencer took it slowly, learning from Ian's mistake. But would that be enough to keep him standing.

He smirked, finding that he could still think coherently. He was about to take a seat by the sidelines when he seemed to have tripped on air and fell flat on the ground like Ian. Two down, two to go.

Tala had seen enough. He'd show them all! He'd put them to shame and keep the one grand himself. Pushing the other two out of the way, he took his glass and chugged half of it down before he put it back down on the table, feeling incredibly sick. "The s-s-shit…" he stuttered. "What did you put in this?!"

"Oh, nothing really." Kai shrugged. "Just the stuff you put in tranquilizers."

The red-head's eyes visibly widened. "The Fuck! Are you trying to kill me?!" He tightened his grip on the table as if trying to restrain himself, but in truth, he was fighting hard not to drop dead.

Kai grinned. "It's not poisonous, bastard." he assured him. "Besides, if you put arsenic in your drinks, what's a bit of this stuff anyway?"

It was obvious that Kai pissed the hell out of the other boy. Tala broke away from the table, trudging towards Kai, looking like he was about to kill him. He would have been more convincing if hew wasn't staggering and shaking visibly. When he grabbed Kai by the collar, the other boy barely felt it, and before Tala could raise a hand to strike him, his legs gave in. "D-d-damn it!" he hissed.

He struggled for a few more seconds, but it was utterly futile.

Looks like there was only one person left.

Surprisingly, Bryan didn't look the lest bit shaken by what had just happened. He was just there, leaning against the wall almost irritated. "Is it my turn yet?"

Kai promised himself he'd wipe that smug look off of his face. "Go for it, cowboy." He said, moving out of the way and giving him access to the last glass left.

The taller boy just rolled his eyes and took the glass from off the table. He wasted no time drinking everything entirely, finishing it in a matter of seconds. He slammed the mug down on the table triumphantly, Giving Kai an even bigger grin. "'S that all?" he asked.

Though he tried his best not to show it, Kai wasn't going to accept this. How could he still be standing?! He waited a few moments for it to take effect, but nothing came.

The lilac-haired boy just crossed his arms and gave Kai a hurry it up look. "I've got an idea." He said arrogantly. "Why don't you give me something to drink while you wait for your face to freeze that way?"

The first impulse Kai had was to hit, him, but instead, he just turned around and walked to the refrigerator, getting him a drink anyway. Taking the first carton of juice in reach, he poured the cranberry juice into a glass and shoved it in Bryan's direction, still waiting to see if his grandfather's oldest bottle of wine would come to effect.

Taking the glass from Kai, Bryan began to drink it, not in much of a hurry. "Well, you better be cleaning out your wallet." He slurred slightly. Wait- slurred? He g;anced at the carton again, confused about what was happening to the other boy. For sure, he had just given him a glass of cranberry juice.

As Bryan continued to talk about the money while taking occasional sips from the juice, it became obvious to Kai that the color of the Russian's face began to grow redder and redder. He was almost talking nonsense. The hell…?

Then, it hit Kai. He knew how he'd be able to keep his cash. "Hey, Kuznetsov." He called in a low sultry voice. Bryan stopped talking for a moment and turned his attention to Kai, all the while he leaned against the table for support. "I know something better then just dirty money." he said, adding a wink to the end of his sentence.

Raising an eyebrow, Bryan looked at Kai estrangedly, but didn't look like he was about to protest. "Keep talkin'." He said in a garbled voice.

Knowing that this was a good chance to take advantage of his state of mind, Kai walked up to him and watched him with inviting eyes, knowing quite well how to play this game. "Well, what I'm saying is, if you used that money WISELY, I could make it worth your while." He breathed, words smothered with connotations and hints for something else.

If it was really his doing or the intoxication that controlled him, Kai was more then overjoyed that the last thing to come out of Bryan's mouth was a sloshed, "You'd better."

---

He had already been long awake when Bryan finally decided to show signs of awakening. Putting his book down for a moment, Kai watched keenly as he stirred in place.

Groaning, he rubbed his eyes with his hand, attempting to get himself awake. "I feel like I got trampled on by a fucking horse." He mumbled, not fully awake yet.

"Close enough." The shorter boy commented in a monotonous reply. After all, why was he complaining? He got the less painful end of the stick, to put it into metaphor.

Bryan sat up in bed, still massaging one of his temples with the other hand. "Dammit." He breathed. "What the fuck happened?"

"Word one two, add question mark exclamation point, space, capitalize word three, word four, period."

Bryan looked at the other boy incredulously, not in to mood to process what he just said. That was… until it hit him. "Fuck. No shit?" he asked shaking his head. "Seriously? Damn." That one came out as more of a joke. "You think I'd remember something like that. Damn. I blew my one grand on that, didn't I?" he mused aloud, sounding cynical but not really upset.

The Russian seemed to take this as more of a joke then the serious matter that it was, and it pissed Kai off slightly. "Well, you WERE smashed as hell." He reminded him bitterly and that seemed to turn Bryan serious again.

He glared at him dangerously, even if it wasn't as threatening with his bed-head and all. "Don't say a word." He growled.

Shrugging as if to give a "Sure. Whatever." to the other boy, Kai resumed reading, putting Bryan back into a false sense of security. A few moments of silence fell over them both, until Kai finally decided to strike back.

"So… Cranberry juice, huh?" he snorted before it turned into full fits of laughter.

"That's it! You die!" Bryan yelled before getting up and started smothering the other boy with a pillow. Of course, it wouldn't kill him, nor even shut him up and he began laughing even more, angering the taller boy to no end.

To say the least, Kai didn't mind at all.

---

Wah! An update! This was for Bryan's Birthday! Whee! Kinda late, but was being mean. --;;


End file.
